A light to my path.

rate

I'm holding back the tears;

HEY :D
Mixed emotions from ystd till now, and i feel lucky to be able to experience HFOS2, something that'll be etched in my memory forever. I really hope it will.

The experience was fantastic. Though there were much tears, there were more smiles :D Everyone was holding back their tears, but i couldn't control mine many times. Omg it was so fabulous i want it to happen again. Rahh, can't believe its all over now. Esp the pre-concert period. You would never imagine how bonded we feel. It's all about giving. How i wish history could repeat itself, let us go through all the pain again, just to get that same feeling once more.

Crying isn't a bad thing after all. Next time, when someone cries, unless it is cos of stuff not worth to cry over, i'll not stop her. I was hoping for a great experience in HFOS2, but i'd never imagine it'll be this good. When you walk in between the two rows of seniors and batchmates, eyes closed, with people encouraging you, whispering "jiayou" and "iloveyou" in your ears, giving you a sudden group hug while shouting "jiayou", complimenting you saying "you're the best", going "well done", people patting your back, giving you a warm hug, the feeling was indescribable. I want to do that again, but i doubt i will ever have the chance to do so. Mrraj taught us more than dance itself, but also about love, friendship, treasuring every minute, doing your best in everything, to forgive & forget, to live; to give; and to share with one another. I shall try my best not to complain, think about others before self, and spend every second wisely, esp moments spent with friends.

I can't bear to see mrraj go, and not have his lessons again. He was such a great teacher, but i must admit the hatred we had for him initially. But all this changed when we realised the true him, the passion he had, and the positive impact he has made on all of us. He said his only regret was not having a camp where we could all bond. Our only hope now is the post-production party.

I hope HFOS2 has touched some people, impacted some people, and made people smile. Our efforts were worth it, the scolding was worth it, the pain and tears were worth it. Needless to say, all the sacrifices made were NOTHING compared to this experience. How i wished time would freeze during that moment when everyone was bursting with emotions, and all we had was a true, innocent heart full of passion. Hah, i guess everyone got addicted to the songs he introduced to us, esp "a hatful of stars". The meaningful lyrics represented the time we spent together, the real and true us inside our heart, when all we had was a hatful of stars. The show is over, but the memory will live on. The music at that moment was the most beautiful music one has ever listened to, the feeling, priceless.

Loved the bowing part too, when we were sincerely grateful to all who have helped us, all who have guided us, and the audience, who have supported us so.

Bye mrraj, we'll definitely miss you, more than you can wish for.

I LOVE TIFFANY :D

Ok you should be happy now :D See aren't i a great sun nu of yours :D
I'm freaking tired cos i think i slept at like 3 ystd, and used up lots of energy today zi-highing and all, now i'm sian. I think only DBSK<3 can save me :D Haha, with their funny videos. LOL.

And i found out that my JIEJIE(grace) and KORKOR(huimin) are geniuses who have high levels of creativity XD
HAHA they have super crazy random ideas! YAY our family is talented :D LOL.

Ok i'm sleepy BYE.

What is the world coming to.

Heyo.
Oh man, why does everything seems wrong now. D:
Not till the point where my life is falling apart, but now, i'm not so sure of my goals, my relationships, and my beliefs. It seems like... well idk how to say but, i'm forcing myself to enjoy life as it is now. It's not nice at all. I seem to be living for others, and not myself. I seem to be so sensitive that i will have an immediate response at someone's behaviour.
Conclusion: chermain, you suck.

Everything is changing. Even i'm changing. Idk what i've become.
I can't be open anymore. I can't share my thoughts freely anymore. I think before i act, think so hard and so much that it's tiring. Why is this happening oh man. D:

The once all zi-high and free and happy-go-lucky chermain has disappeared.
I admit that i'm putting on a mask now, such hypocrisy.
There are no tears in my eyes.
I feel like deleting this whole post and hurry go get myself busy and tired or something.
It's not for people to see and comment.
I think i burried myself too long alr.
I'm dying within myself.
I'm under too many masks, and i can't breathe.
Shit, what is becoming of me.
I fear too much, think too much.
I think all the negative energy are the reasons for all the headaches i'm suffering.
I feel unwell.
I feel horrible.
I wanna get out.
I am no longer who i am.
You're a monster chermain.

isuckisuckisuckisuckisuckisuckisuckisuckisuck D:

end of episode.

BOOOO :D today dance was damn funnyyy :D Haha, when ms yeo came in, and started "complaining" and clarifying. HAHA. i'm not supposed to tell what happened so too bad you can't really hear about it and laugh tgt. We laughed like crazy. Andandand CHEE KANG <3 is very cute! haha. i put a heart there for fun,dont really know him anyway. Anyway, he's just a primary3 nyps guy, who is PRO. Did cartwheels like he was eating his breakfast, and if he did his warmups and wore proper clothes, he'll do backflips like he's brushing his teeth :D

Lol. P3 lehs. We all kept applauding. But he's super small size. And i mean super small. Nat thought he was only 5 -.- and he's like, 9? much smaller size than my bro, for sure.

LALALA. <33333 NYMD sec2'08. And lols the seniors are pissed cos we are getting a batch tee. I think cos it means that we're not bonded as a CCA, but as a batch. But i feel it's perfectly alright for us to get one, then maybe get another one as a CCA. Cos this just shows we're bonded as a batch, and we can wear the shirt during CCA! We don't have the nymd tee which the seniors have, so we only can wear the boring PE shirt D: but i understand luhs. i'm fine with anything :D :D :D

Tiffany is hopeless.
She just doesn't want to admit that LZX is still not hong enough.
HAHA. but it's good that she's such a loyal fannn :D :D :D i'm not being sarcastic here.
Am super occupied during recesses and lunch these days, with the concert coming so soon. Can't wait for post-production partyyyy! (:

Rahh, can't wait to go AMK hub this sat with nainai, but i think it'll be short D:

Am dying under SIAs, and i TOTALLY can't stand SIAs.
i cannot stand some people right now too, they're getting on my nerves.
And i hardly blow my temper.
Just change that horrid attitude of yours, it's not nice at all.

NYMD fighting!! :D

<3

Heyyy.
"proud" is an amazingly beautiful song :D
here, a nice video to start of this post XD

Went out with nat after tuition today as usual :D :D :
couldnt find kampong glam, needless to say, didnt manage to get the kompang{spell?}
Sorry junning! D:

Haha, anyway, walked around with nat, and bought a top! :D yay chermain's happy.
But # (#*% @)*. D:
Anyway, bought a cool superman pencil for MRRAJ! lols. It'll be from the whole of NYMD sec2'08! hee. Aren't i a genius. It's HIS song, so we shall get him himself. Lol wth am i crapping. I think only nymd-ers will know XD

I'm back to blogging all thanks to nainai. HAHA. If i slack too much its her fault! Lol.
WHERE AM I GOING TO GET MY WHITE SHIRT + SHORTS/PANTS. oh man D:
& i hate my wardrobe D: have been complaining to nat and nainai for the past two days lols. I wonder if they're tired of me repeating it lols.

OHOHOH. and the "Save money, eat bread" activity is going to start once again! Yes, me and nainai are going to save up, and bring home food for the next few weeks :D

HFOS 2 is the love.
But i'm not prepared yet D:
JIAYOU nymd-ers. Let's prove them wrong; we're versatile alright, and dont need changes.
[s]or is it just us, afraid of the change?[/s]

Okay shall end post here and check history file contents :D

BB! dbsk fighting! <3

HELLOOOO (((:
haha i shall be a guai kia and post :D hee see i'm a good girl nainai :D

YAY I <3333333 NAINAI.
OHOHOH +++ DBSK(:

haha. gosh nainai is super funny. she really is a HUGEEEEEE supporter of luozhixiang man. like really super huge. we went J8 today :D with nat. haha ate at WANZAI. Yumm. Haha we ate like some people who havent eaten for days. Gosh were really hungry luhs. That's the effect after dance these days. We get really exhausted + hungry. But its all worth it :DDD Really <3 nymd, esp sec2'08. Wah, cant wait for next batch outing :D hope more people can make it.

oh man MEI seems real skinny and tired these days D: poor thing D: oh man. and she's really huggable :D HEE.
LALALA. i totally love weekends now :D YAYY. saturday = dance! + out with tiff &/or other NYMD-ers; sunday = Bugis/ other places with nat!
<333

OH AND eunice is now officially my laogong. lols. HAHA. anyway, i heart my laogong! <333

And i can't stand the pointless meetings happened in the past few days. Really ... pointless. Our povs don't get through to them, and history repeated itself for both times. Rah. Why is it like that D: BOO.

LALALA. wanted to upload random pics i took in the past week, but i'm too lazy XD YOU SEE. mei just signed in on msn, and her dn is OM OM OM. haha. busy person. oh and did i mention she's a perfectionist? that's why. so now you know they're bad points of being a perfectionist. MEIMEI JIAYOU! <3

Rah, can't stand my slack attitude. chermainang, you better do something to stop this. D: Shall i use DBSK as motivation? lols. what if i end up watching their videos non-stop D: wah i've such lousy self-control skills ...

OH and people remember to support "A Hatful of Stars 2"!! :D ;
19 april; 3-4/7.30-8.30; siew may auditorium; $12
thankyouthankyou :D

LALALA. i shall stop blabbering crap. SAYONARA!